How David Fitzsimmons overcame embarrassment and shame and learned to love mall walking

David Fitzsimmons, former columnist and cartoonist for the Arizona Daily Star in Tucson, joined The Show for a meditation on a time-honored tradition in the Arizona heat: mall walking.

Full conversation

GILGER: Good morning, David. Thank you for coming on.

FITZSIMMONS: Good morning, Lauren. I am honored to be on your station and on your program.

GILGER: Should I call you Luke Mall-Walker instead here?

FITZSIMMONS: Absolutely. That is my bride's nickname for me. Yes.

GILGER: [LAUGHS] All right, so you write a Substack now, David. And you wrote a piece that we're gonna talk about here, about your regular mall walks. And everybody kind of knows what this is, right? It's people, often retirees, who in especially the heat here in Arizona, are walking around the mall to get a little exercise in the air conditioning.

You tried to go outside to hike. It's too hot. So, inside it is, right?

FITZSIMMONS: Oh, absolutely. In fact, I tried an outdoor hike here in Tucson this week, And man, I headed right back to the mall, because the mall is air conditioned, it's safe and there are no bobcats.

GILGER: When did you start doing this, David?

FITZSIMMONS: I started doing this about two years ago after I got a stent implanted in my poor old journalist's heart. And I needed strenuous exercise, and I usually relied upon hiking outdoors in the summertime. But after my cardiac experience, I decided maybe that's not quite so smart. So I thought I would struggle with overcoming — and here's the part I think I will confess to you — embarrassment about being a mall walker. Because I would, you know, when you go to the malls and you see mall walkers, you see mostly older folks. But I've seen folks there as young as my age, 70 — 70-year-olds out there walking the malls.

And I thought, I'll try it. And sure enough, if you just speed walk, I'm able to do a 2-mile hike on a daily basis. Get my aerobic going, get my pulse up and feel pretty good about the remainder of the day. And I'm not brain fried or completely smoked by the heat. ...

And like I, and I gotta say, like I, you know, the other day there was a news story here out of Tucson. A bear had wandered into a Fry's supermarket. And I thought, "Dang, you know, when's that gonna happen next time at a mall?" The only thing I've ever seen at the mall in that regard is maybe a cougar. And that would be my wife. [LAUGHS]

GILGER: David, is this a community? Like, do you know the other mall walkers?

FITZSIMMONS: That's a really good question, because the fact is I really don't know any of their mall walkers. But we recognize each other and we nod, we wave, we tip our hats. And I even have come to recognize the security guards, and they will recognize me. And occasionally, you know, I'll get that look like, "Wow, he's still alive." But I don't care. I don't care. It's ever onward, ever onward.

David Fitzsimmons

GILGER: It seems like this is kind of a people-watching exercise to you, too, especially reading what you wrote about it. Like, you write about the teenagers in Spencer's, the cart vendors who are scrolling their phones, the people offering you lotion samples. What are your slices of life that you've appreciated most in your mall walking?

FITZSIMMONS: Oh, that's the absolute pleasure of it. And on those days when my wife will accompany me, we find ourselves nicknaming some of the walkers. You know, there goes "Scooter." Oh, here comes "Marathon Man." Whoa, look out for "Thelma and Louise." They might knock you down. And then there's "Wheezy," "Skippy," "Spandex." And, you know, for the older generation, sometimes we'll see "Ike and Mamie."

And there's another fellow we'll see called "Windbreaker." You do not want to walk behind him. ... Also, sometimes, to extend the hike, we will speed walk, taking side trips to various shops like Spencer's Gifts, which is kind of astonishing to this old man who hadn't been to Spencer's in years.

I kind of marvel at the little toddlers in the back of the Spencer's, admiring the adult novelties — which are a little bit racy for those kids. But I love going to the mall because this endless distraction. If you're the kind of person, like myself, who is a short attention span, very restless, and doesn't really care for strenuous exercise, the mall is perfect because it is full of excellent distractions.

And I have to say, another reason I go to the mall is because I write about current issues in the news, and I need stress relief. And the mall is the perfect place for stress release. It's just rife for this great Americana, and it's just a wonderful experience.

And I'm so glad I took the leap, overcame my embarrassment and shame, and joined the rest of the crew that's out there getting good, healthy exercise.

GILGER: Right. Let me ask you about that last, like, this idea that you're, you know, becoming a stereotype here, right?

FITZSIMMONS: Oh, absolutely.

GILGER: You write about the point is the exercise, you know, the getting out, the working your heart after you got a stent. I wonder what you're trying to do here, as you write, outpace death. Does it feel like that's a chase?

FITZSIMMONS: Oh, absolutely. And friends in my age group, 110 and over — well, actually, I'm 70. Most of them have had health issues. And a common joke among us, which might have a morbid sense to it, but maybe some of your older listeners might relate to this. My joke was when I survived my heart issue was that I now have the greatest motivational coach in the world.

And that motivational coach is fear of death. You know, I imagine the grim reaper behind me. Anytime I think, man, I don't feel like exercising today. I feel that tap on the shoulder and I see that scythe sort of waving in the breeze and think, "Oh, better get going." And that has motivated me like nothing else, and I'm grateful for it.

And also, you know, having a sense of your mortality really enriches your appreciation for your daily life.

GILGER: Yeah, even the things in the mall, right?

FITZSIMMONS: Oh, even the things in the mall. And I gotta say, for about 30 years, I was a stand-up comedian on the side. And malls are just full of great comedy material. It's just endless and, you know, just the human beings that are there.

The other day I was talking to my wife. We're joking about memory loss as we get older — ha ha. You know, you have to laugh to keep from crying. ... And my wife said, "You know, if you get lost, just follow the scent of the mall walkers." And I said, "What's that?" And she said, "Oh, it's kind of BenGay with a faint air of Maalox." OK, she's making fun of me. That's what she's doing.

GILGER: We'll have to leave it there for now. That is David Fitzsimmons, former columnist and cartoonist with the Arizona Daily Star in Tucson, telling us about his mall walking. David, thank you so much for coming on. I really appreciate it.

FITZSIMMONS: You're welcome. Have a beautiful day, Lauren.

GILGER: You, too.